| 1. What do you think of Valentine's Day? |
I think it's an exploitation of people's emotions. |
| 2. Who will you be spending the day with this year? |
I will be spending it with myself. |
| 3. Will you be sending out Valentine's Day cards? |
No, I will not. |
| 4. Do you believe in.... Cupid? |
Do I believe in the pagan god Eros? No, no I do not. |
| 5. Has he ever stabbed you with an arrow? |
No Answer |
| 6. What body part does he usually stab? |
Stop it. |
| 7. Will you receive a gift on V day? |
I was supposed to, but Fate had different plans. |
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| 8. Will you give a gift to anyone? |
I will indeed. |
| 9. Do you think the day is a waste of time? |
Perhaps it is not completely. |
| 10. A corporate holiday? |
That, my friend, is not a sentence. |
| 11. Do you think it's a corporate holiday, but still like it? |
There you go, my boy! |
| 12. Are you excited about possible Apple announcements on Valentine's Day? |
I do not know what that means. |
| 13. Watching any Valentine movies? |
Are you learning proper English? |
| 14. Would you rather get flowers, or chocolate? |
I would rather receive the love and affection I so crave. |
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| 15. Do you have a Valentine this year? |
No, I do not. |
| 16. Do you have a "sweetheart" or a Valentine? |
The difference would be what? |
| 17. ....Does your Valentine know they're your Valentine? |
I suppose they would have to, would not they? |
| 18. Pink, white, or red: |
Yes, those are pigmentations. |
| 19. A bubble bath, a dozen red roses, or a heart shaped cake? |
Would somone else be involved? |
| 20. Or do you think all of the above are really, really lame? |
No, I do not. |
| 21. Would you rather just have chicken and beer? |
No, I would not. |
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| 22. Ever broken up on VDay? |
No, I have not. |
| 23. What has been your worst Valentine celebration ever? |
I could not recall. |
| 24. What has been your best Valentine celebration ever? |
I repeat my last thought. |
| 25. Does VDay usually just make you depressed? |
It is depressing how easily people are manipulated. |
| 26. How about them candy hearts? |
I love how they are chalky. |
| 27. Have you ever thought about how much sugar is in them? |
Yes, I have. It's too much for a meal, but perhaps they are alright for a nice snack before a jog. |
| 28. Give your Valentine vegetables this year and you'll have many more Valentine's days in the future. |
Excuse me? |
| 29. Any final thoughts? |
You are foolish. |