| 1. 1. What is the most embarrassing thing you have done while drinking? |
Took an leak in an inapropriate place, at an inopportune time. He didn't need those books until next semester anyway. |
| 2. 2. Who do you like to go out and drink with the most? |
Rich and generous alchoholics. |
| 3. 3. Do you drink tequila... why or why not? |
It's made from a cactus amigo, and It tastes like finely crafted ass. |
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| 4. 4. Have you ever drunk dialed? |
Yep. How else is the pizza gonna get here? |
| 5. 5. Are you an emotional drunk? |
Sure. I love more people than the Dali Lama and Gene Simmons combined. |
| 6. 6. Have you ever sang karaoke while you were drunk? |
Only while in Japan. Here, I'm just loud and annoying while crooning "paradice city". |
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| 7. 7. What is your favorite shot? |
The one where the girl dumps it down my pants before injesting. Let's call it the "weiner" shot. You say there's no such thing? Well call me Thomas Edison babe. |
| 8. 8. Are you ever the designated driver? |
Na, that's the cops. Fee ride to the gray bar motel. |
| 9. 9. What's your favorite song to listen to when you're drunk? |
None, I like listening to the sirens as they cart me off to the hospital for alchohol poisoning. |
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| 10. 10. Do you think you can dance better when your drunk? |
2 sips and I'm Baryshnikov's understudy. |
| 11. 11. Have you ever lost or "misplaced" something because you were too drunk? |
I was so drunk I misplaced my urine. Oh there it is, on your driveway. |
| 12. 12. Ever passed out somewhere crazy because you were so drunk? |
I woke up at a clinic for bulemics. Actually, it was my bathroom, but it sure felt that way. |
| 13. 13. Ever injured yourself because you were trying to do something and you were drunk? |
Yeah, my liver... I was trying to metabolize all the alcohol I injested when it actually cried out to me. Unfortunately I don't speak liver. |
| 14. 14. Have you ever been to Mardi Gras? |
I got a snorkel and some beads, I'm going this year. |
| 15. 15. How often do you drink? |
In all reality, hardly at all. |